One of the most common things I hear about myself is how quiet I am. A lot of the time it is mentioned with some sort of distaste, like it is a bad thing. But yet it is rare to have someone complain about someone being loud. What makes being quiet so different? I just want to say, I’m quiet…and that’s not bad.
Silence doesn’t mean that something is wrong.
Just because I am quiet does not mean I am suffering or angry or lonely. It does not mean I am being rude. Even if I have major RBF going on, it does not mean that I don’t like you or am judging you.
If you are talking to me and you think me uninterested or bored, that is more than likely not the case.
In a conversation, I listen for a long time before I even think about speaking. In life, I pause and observe. In relationships, I learn from others. On my own, I spend time getting to know myself.
I am not broken and I don’t need to be fixed.
Society almost has it in for us quiet people. The noisy people are regarded as ‘normal’. Quiet people get asked all the time what is wrong with them.
People close to me know that I hold a lot in until I feel I have something worth saying. If I say ‘I don’t care’ or ‘whatever’ I mean it! Once I have something to say, then you know that I have an opinion or have really thought about the topic.
In a group, I am mostly multi-tasking during discussions. I am thinking about what the person is saying, thinking about what I want to say, thinking about how I would rather be somewhere else, thinking about what I need at the store, thinking about the weather, thinking about how I could do this one thing that I thought about earlier. The list is endless.
My blank face doesn’t mean anything against you. Unless it does…but that is a whole different thing…
I don’t like gossip or nosiness.
I honestly don’t care to be in everyone’s business. I’m not interested in what John down the street said or what cousin Sophia is doing. I really couldn’t care less.
When friends and family are gossiping or getting all nosy in my business I kind of shut down.
I could not imagine getting nosy into their business and so it makes me quite uncomfortable when it is happening in front of me.
You will not hear me asking question after question about your life or the lives of people you know. If you volunteer information then I will for sure listen, but again, I will more than likely be multi-tasking.
I notice more than you think I do.
Since I am quiet, I notice so many things that the average person wouldn’t be fazed by.
Looks between two people that are in the early stages of a relationship, the weird attitude that someone gives me when they think I am not paying attention, the mannerisms between family members.
I notice plenty of things that don’t involve people at all! Knowing when one of our pets is slightly off and they appear normal to everyone else, the plant that grew a couple inches overnight, the fence that is going to break any day now.
It is a fascinating world and to observe so much is quite interesting.
If you know someone that is quiet, please don’t just assume anything about them. It’s not better to be loud. I’m quiet…and that’s not bad.